I’ve been asked many times through the years questions like:  “what steps do I take to recover from trauma?” or “What stages of healing can I expect?”

Sigh. I’d love to have a clearly structured simple answer for you.

There is a boatload of great information in books, social media posts, webinars, workshops, etc. about trauma and healing. Sometimes you get the impression that their way is the way to quick, step-by-step resolution of effects of trauma…  

I have found, though, that there is no 1 path, or step-by-step manual, or magnificent therapist for trauma healing that will work for everyone.

Because your experience is uniquely yours… and your body has responded in away that is uniquely yours… and you live in the context of a family that is uniquely yours…

This is hard, I know. 

Because one thing that is common for trauma survivors is:

The traumas you experienced were felt to be unbearable & unpredictable. They leave you feeling powerless in the world & in your own body… and you really just want to take the “right” steps so that the world or someone will help you feel safe again…

It is really vulnerable to feel powerless in your body and thus the world…

What hope can I give you?

Each of our counsellors is equipped in unique ways to hold a space of therapy that helps you move forward in healing and feeling safer in the world.

I encourage you to explore self-compassion – your body is trying to protect you…

Dare I say, the trauma response (energy) is a bit of  “gift”?  

I say this because it’s an adaptation to help you survive… and its just mis-timing its continued response if you are now away from the traumatic situations.

Okay, so how do I do “Self-compassion”?

Self-compassion is to say to yourself “I can be grateful for my body’s adaptive responses to keep me safe”…

Then notice the triggers: 

“Why is this alarm bell going off in this particular situation?”

“What has been going on over the past few days, weeks, months?”…

… because our body’s systems don’t always have an immediate reaction to triggers… it can build up over days, weeks, months, and then trauma reaction symptoms feel like they happen suddenly… like a cup of water slowly filling up to the brim and “suddenly” overflowing.

When you notice the overflow, wonder with that continued self-compassion:

“What do I need right now?”

And try to meet your need….  If you cannot do it right away, say to yourself with intention when you will do that.

Need a bit more coaching through self-compassion & releasing trauma energy?

Counselling with a trauma-attuned therapist is an excellent help… but I know that is sometimes inaccessible because of costs or waitlists…